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Today was not like an ordi­nary day for me. It’s been a few days or may I say weeks that I real­ized that wait­ing is real­ly hard.

Wait­ing is annoy­ing for an impa­tient man like me.

Wait­ing is hard when you know have been accus­tomed to your own self-suf­fi­cien­cy and calls only to the Lord when you already have exhaust­ed every­thing.

And last­ly,

Wait­ing is not easy when your faith is incom­plete and you are always strug­gling with nev­erend­ing “whys”.

That was the whole pic­ture of me. I am an impa­tient man, I want results, I want to do some­thing, I want to make an effort, and wait­ing seems a pas­sive activ­i­ty for me.

Yes­ter­day, the preach­ing hit me hard. I cried while I pray (Okay, it’s very hot and my eyes sweat).  In his book, Apos­tle James com­mand­ed us to (not sug­gest­ed, not encour­age, and not to think about it) to BE PATIENT.


I was think­ing inside, how could be that be pos­si­ble?

It is easy to wait when you’re wait­ing for some­thing and expect­ing a good result.

It is easy to wait for some­one you love and care for.

It is easy to wait when you know you have invest­ed into some­thing that you know will grow after sev­er­al years.

It is easy to wait for a mon­ey when you still have a reserve in your bank account.

But, what if God asks you to wait when you don’t even know if it’s a yes or no?

What if some­one you love and care for becomes unlov­able and dis­re­spect­ful, should you still wait with­out even grum­bling?

What if you don’t have any mon­ey left in your bank account or invest­ments and you are only depen­dent to your salary and yet you have debts to pay, should you wait for the bless­ing of the Lord or will you bor­row mon­ey again?

What if one day, your invest­ment didn’t grow after 10 years, should you still wait?

Then I real­ize that:



And what’s more painful to see? Our trust and com­plete depen­den­cy on God starts to fade.

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Boom! I am guilty your hon­or.

This some­how remind­ed me of my devo­tion today in Matthew 19:13–15 “Jesus said, let the lit­tle chil­dren come to me, for to such belongs the king­dom of heav­en.”

In our soci­ety, chil­dren seem unno­ticed. We as adults think of them as some­one who doesn’t care yet, has no respon­si­bil­i­ty and some­one who only loves to play. So some­times when things become uneasy, we try to tame them so they will not become noisy when the ser­vice starts.

But one thing I noticed here; it was the same thing what the dis­ci­ples did when chil­dren were com­ing to Jesus! The dis­ci­ples pre­vent­ed them to come to him! But Jesus rebuked them, say­ing; let them come to me!

Now it was odd, in Jew­ish prac­tice, the par­ents usu­al­ly come to the rab­bis to bless their chil­dren. In fact, chil­dren are such an impor­tant being in the Jew­ish com­mu­ni­ty! But why are the dis­ci­ples pre­vent­ing them to come to Jesus? It’s because they think they will do noth­ing and will only be a waste of time for Jesus.

But of course, Jesus wasn’t lit­er­al­ly refer­ring to the chil­dren. I think he metaphor­i­cal­ly described chil­dren as an object les­son for the dis­ci­ples.

This remind­ed me that chil­dren don’t have fear nor any doubts. They are com­plete­ly depen­dent on some­one who feeds them. They cried, they quar­rel and get angry with oth­er chil­dren yet after a few hours they can for­give each oth­er. And one more thing, chil­dren when they have been reject­ed, they feel dis­ap­point­ed but after a few hours, they will try again!

We as adults don’t have the abil­i­ty like that. As we grow, it will be hard­er to for­give once trust is bro­ken. It will be hard­er to trust God when things don’t work out the way we prayed for it. It will be hard­er to get up when we have been reject­ed a few times.

That’s what Jesus is talk­ing about. Be an adult yet be like chil­dren. Not being child­ish in his own ways but be child-like in faith, in for­giv­ing, and believ­ing in greater things.

Today I am blessed because a friend remind­ed me of it. For years I con­stant­ly ask God and some­times I ran out of “whys” because for every rejec­tion I expe­ri­ence, though I know it has helped me to grow as a per­son,  yet,  it builds up a scar on my heart as time goes by and pre­vent­ing myself to have my faith ful­ly depen­dent on God.

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I was think­ing that I ful­ly sur­ren­dered my will to God but deep inside I have my own reser­va­tions. Just like “Lord, I am hope­ful and claim­ing suc­cess on this.” But then I am set­ting myself ready to accept rejec­tion and defeat so it will not be painful just in case. I have been accus­tomed to that and not being ful­ly aware that I’m allow­ing myself to be defeat­ed even it is not hap­pen­ing yet.

Today I felt my faith has been renewed again because of that con­ver­sa­tion. And I can say that;


James gave us a few exam­ples of what is it look like to have patience:

  • A farmer who waits for the har­vest.
  • A prophet who waits for the Lord, like Eli­jah and yet he wait­ed and did so many great things for the Lord.
  • Job who suf­fered and lost every­thing he had and yet he was ful­ly depen­dent on God and nev­er utter any curse or ques­tioned God why it is hap­pen­ing to him.

Yet in all of these exam­ples, Jesus was the great­est. He suf­fered, despised, reject­ed,  wait­ed, and not even a com­plain came out from His mouth and yet He will­ing­ly sub­mit­ted Him­self to man, for us to be rec­on­ciled to God.

This arti­cle was orig­i­nal­ly pub­lished on

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I blog about my dis­cov­er­ies and learn­ings with per­son­al devel­op­ment, blog­ging, writ­ing, pub­lic speak­ing, and pub­lish­ing. I am a Jesus fol­low­er. Each month, I send out a newslet­ter with free tips on those top­ics.

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