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Last July, I met with a friend and a men­tor, his name is Jesse, a fel­low toast­mas­ter, a speak­er, and a finan­cial plan­ner. We talk a lot about dif­fer­ent things and what’s going on with our lives, what’s my plan, what are my dreams and aspi­ra­tions. He even asked me when I could leave the cor­po­rate life.

Well, If it was not for the mis­sion that God gave to stay in the mar­ket­place for this sea­son and with the present real­i­ty of my life that I have bills to pay, and dream house to build, I would­n’t stay any longer. My advice is that take it step by step.


Wishful Thinking

And then a thought came while lis­ten­ing to him that this per­son has achieved more than what I have achieved. Then in our cir­cles, one of my friends also at a young age became a CEO of a com­pa­ny. Wow! I am so priv­i­leged that God has brought me to learn from this peo­ple. But then, I became inse­cure; I wish I have start­ed ear­ly. I wish I have learned these things at a young age. How I wish, I did not apply for a job when I was a fresh grad­u­ate but rather start a busi­ness on my own. Ugh, wish­ful think­ing.

Can you relate?. How ter­ri­ble the feel­ing was when you are being sur­round­ed with suc­cess­ful peo­ple that you thought about your own fail­ures and what have you done in your life.


There is no wasted time for God

Then what he told me blew me away. He said, “Dhenn, it is not because you failed, or you missed the mark at that age, it’s just that at that young age, their sea­son has come. In every­thing, there is a sea­son right? A time to reap and a time to sow. Per­haps the time they were reap­ing, you were sow­ing expe­ri­ences.”

He remind­ed me that there is no wast­ed time for God. He caused all things to hap­pen at the right time. He caused all things to hap­pen to work togeth­er for our good whether it is bad, painful or not.

Then I remem­ber anoth­er friend came and said, “I’m so glad that God is doing great things in your life. I see some of it and He caused you to increase in every way but as I saw your life, I doubt­ed what God is doing in my life. I became full of doubt whether I am walk­ing accord­ing to His will or even ful­fill­ing the call­ing He has for me. I had not the same suc­cess as you are.”


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You are not me

I looked at him and asked him, “Do you think you will still full of doubts and it would feel you bet­ter if you see me liv­ing a ter­ri­ble life and had been doing much worse in the past few years?” “Of course not.” He respond­ed.

I said, “Sor­ry but I did­n’t mean to offend you but your think­ing is flawed. You said the oth­er was true but the sec­ond is not. If the oth­er is true, what I said must be true, because you are com­par­ing your­self to me.”

What hap­pens in my life and what God will do with it has noth­ing to do with what God is doing in your life. You are not me, and I am not you.” I added.


Focus on what God is doing in your life

I remem­ber a sto­ry of an employ­ee who was con­stant­ly com­plain­ing that man­age­ment is cor­rupt not lis­ten­ing to its employ­ees and some of his col­leagues are lazy and unpro­duc­tive. And then he set a meet­ing with his man­ag­er about it.

All the way down, the man­ag­er lis­tened to his com­plaints. Then the man­ag­er asked a favor from him. “Before you leave, can you give me two full glass of water, please?. Make sure there’s no spill will get into the floor not even a lit­tle.”

The employ­ee came back and gave the glass­es to the man­ag­er. Then the man­ag­er asked him, “While you were walk­ing with both of your hands have full water of glass, do you see any employ­ees who are unpro­duc­tive? Do you see any of them gos­sip­ing around? Do you see the man­age­ment scold­ing oth­er employ­ees?” “No there’s none.” The employ­ee respond­ed.

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You will find that God rarely uses peo­ple whose pri­ma­ry con­cern is what oth­ers are doing. When God told Noah to build an ark, Noah did what God has told of Him, he did­n’t com­plain that peo­ple are not believ­ing him.

Judg­ing oth­ers is a major waste of time. It halts progress. I’ve met and seen peo­ple doing that. They think they are doing bet­ter than the aver­age per­son in which it makes them an aver­age per­son.

It does­n’t mean that they don’t have what you have, does­n’t mean they are not suc­cess­ful. Your faults will nev­er van­ish by call­ing atten­tion to the fault of oth­ers. In the same way, it does­n’t mean you don’t have what they have, does­n’t mean they are more suc­cess­ful than you are.

Don’t let oth­ers define your suc­cess. Don’t let oth­er peo­ple tell you what you want. No one can build him­self upon the faith or expe­ri­ence of anoth­er per­son.

Don’t mea­sure your Fail­ure as a per­son by what oth­ers have, and your suc­cess by what oth­ers haven’t. Keep that in mind.

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I blog about my dis­cov­er­ies and learn­ings with per­son­al devel­op­ment, blog­ging, writ­ing, pub­lic speak­ing, and pub­lish­ing. I am a Jesus fol­low­er. Each month, I send out a newslet­ter with free tips on those top­ics.

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