Last July, I met with a friend and a mentor, his name is Jesse, a fellow toastmaster, a speaker, and a financial planner. We talk a lot about different things and what's going on with our lives, what's my plan, what are my dreams and aspirations. He even asked me when I could leave the corporate life.

Well, If it was not for the mission that God gave to stay in the marketplace for this season and with the present reality of my life that I have bills to pay, and dream house to build, I wouldn't stay any longer. My advice is that take it step by step.


Wishful Thinking

And then a thought came while listening to him that this person has achieved more than what I have achieved. Then in our circles, one of my friends also at a young age became a CEO of a company. Wow! I am so privileged that God has brought me to learn from this people. But then, I became insecure; I wish I have started early. I wish I have learned these things at a young age. How I wish, I did not apply for a job when I was a fresh graduate but rather start a business on my own. Ugh, wishful thinking.

Can you relate?. How terrible the feeling was when you are being surrounded with successful people that you thought about your own failures and what have you done in your life.


There is no wasted time for God

Then what he told me blew me away. He said, "Dhenn, it is not because you failed, or you missed the mark at that age, it's just that at that young age, their season has come. In everything, there is a season right? A time to reap and a time to sow. Perhaps the time they were reaping, you were sowing experiences."

He reminded me that there is no wasted time for God. He caused all things to happen at the right time. He caused all things to happen to work together for our good whether it is bad, painful or not.

Then I remember another friend came and said, "I'm so glad that God is doing great things in your life. I see some of it and He caused you to increase in every way but as I saw your life, I doubted what God is doing in my life. I became full of doubt whether I am walking according to His will or even fulfilling the calling He has for me. I had not the same success as you are."


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You are not me

I looked at him and asked him, "Do you think you will still full of doubts and it would feel you better if you see me living a terrible life and had been doing much worse in the past few years?" "Of course not." He responded.

I said, "Sorry but I didn't mean to offend you but your thinking is flawed. You said the other was true but the second is not. If the other is true, what I said must be true, because you are comparing yourself to me."

"What happens in my life and what God will do with it has nothing to do with what God is doing in your life. You are not me, and I am not you." I added.


Focus on what God is doing in your life

I remember a story of an employee who was constantly complaining that management is corrupt not listening to its employees and some of his colleagues are lazy and unproductive. And then he set a meeting with his manager about it.

All the way down, the manager listened to his complaints. Then the manager asked a favor from him. "Before you leave, can you give me two full glass of water, please?. Make sure there's no spill will get into the floor not even a little."

The employee came back and gave the glasses to the manager. Then the manager asked him, "While you were walking with both of your hands have full water of glass, do you see any employees who are unproductive? Do you see any of them gossiping around? Do you see the management scolding other employees?" "No there's none." The employee responded.

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You will find that God rarely uses people whose primary concern is what others are doing. When God told Noah to build an ark, Noah did what God has told of Him, he didn't complain that people are not believing him.

Judging others is a major waste of time. It halts progress. I've met and seen people doing that. They think they are doing better than the average person in which it makes them an average person.

It doesn't mean that they don't have what you have, doesn't mean they are not successful. Your faults will never vanish by calling attention to the fault of others. In the same way, it doesn't mean you don't have what they have, doesn't mean they are more successful than you are.

Don't let others define your success. Don't let other people tell you what you want. No one can build himself upon the faith or experience of another person.

Don't measure your Failure as a person by what others have, and your success by what others haven't. Keep that in mind.

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I blog about my discoveries and learnings with personal development, blogging, writing, public speaking, and publishing. I am a Jesus follower. Each month, I send out a newsletter with free tips on those topics.

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