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love and life

You know the sto­ry, we all have these expe­ri­ences when we went out with some­one we have admired for a such a long time, and oh, not for­got to men­tion the bat­tles you’ve faced with­in your­self, the strug­gle you had when you fought your own fear of ask­ing her out on a date and then both of you had a great time and the sto­ry goes on, then it’s up to you how you will end the sto­ry.

When was your first date hap­pened? How was your expe­ri­ence? Mine was almost 3 years ago and it was great indeed. I can say that going out with the one you love espe­cial­ly with the one you’ve dreamed of to spend your life with, prob­a­bly one of the great­est thing that could ever hap­pen to you.

Last Thurs­day, it was my first time to attend a Toast Mas­ters Club meet­ing since I decid­ed to join one to devel­op my abil­i­ty to speak, to com­mu­ni­cate and to lead. And as usu­al, they said that dur­ing the month of Feb­ru­ary, “love is in the air”. And our top­ic was about love that’s why I decid­ed to write some­thing about it as my valen­tine’s blog entry for this month.

Dat­ing is a sea­son of get­ting to know the per­son we are con­sid­er­ing to be a life­time part­ner, by going out togeth­er on a restau­rant to try new food, going out to watch a movie and etc. And yes, we all know that dat­ing does­n’t last, that’s why a Chris­t­ian sug­gest­ed not to date espe­cial­ly when the intent is not for mar­riage because the rea­son is sim­ple — it does­n’t last, it would only a waste of time, mon­ey, effort and worst.. invest­ed emo­tions. While most Chris­tians enter the sea­son of courtship instead, where­in a seri­ous com­mit­ment is estab­lished, a guy only go out with a one woman and woman would not allow any oth­er men to date or court her and con­sid­ered as pre-engage­ment.

Let me share a short sto­ry first:

Dur­ing the reign of Queen Vic­to­ria, it has been said in the his­to­ry that Prime Min­is­ter Ben­jamin Dis­raeli of Eng­land and his polit­i­cal rival had a date with the same woman on a dif­fer­ent nights. Lat­er the woman asked about her impres­sion between the two mighty men. She said, “when I left the din­ing room after sit­ting next to Mr. Glad­stone, I thought he was the clever­est man in Eng­land”, but after sit­ting next to Mr.Disraeli, I thought I was the clever­est woman in Eng­land.

Lat­er, Ben­jamin Dis­raeli won the posi­tion of being a Prime Min­is­ter of Eng­land.

SEE ALSO:  The Two Types of Relationships You Might Never Heard Of

I’m not a rela­tion­ship expert to give advice to you but here’s what I learn from my pre­vi­ous dat­ing expe­ri­ence, if you want to get to know the oth­er per­son stop talk­ing about your­self, stop talk­ing about your accom­plish­ments, your expe­ri­ences or any­thing you could offer on the table. Start talk­ing about the oth­er per­son. The same prin­ci­ple applies in life if we want to win more peo­ple, we can win more friends by becom­ing gen­uine­ly inter­est­ed to them.

Whether it could be dat­ing or courtship, both of their pur­pose is to get to know the oth­er per­son. Dale Carnegie, in his book How to Win Friends and Influ­ence Peo­ple he said: “You can make more friends in two months by becom­ing inter­est­ed in oth­er peo­ple than you can in two years by try­ing to get oth­er peo­ple inter­est­ed in you.”

Do you have  date this Valen­tine’s Day? Maybe you can apply this words of wis­dom to your date today. :).

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I blog about my dis­cov­er­ies and learn­ings with per­son­al devel­op­ment, blog­ging, writ­ing, pub­lic speak­ing, and pub­lish­ing. I am a Jesus fol­low­er. Each month, I send out a newslet­ter with free tips on those top­ics.

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