5 Ways on How Not to follow your dreams

Yesterday while I was scrolling through my Facebook news feed, I stumbled on a video clip that came from a movie showed already some few years back then but it was an eye opener for me (to watch the video click here). In the middle part of the video clip was asking a question "How much did they pay you to give up on your dreams?. 

I was stun for a moment, I remember myself 6 years ago when was the time that I was so excited to land a job just to earn a few thousands just to pay my bills and save nothing! It was my dream to be a programmer and then start my own software company but it didn't happen. And so I traded my dreams for a stable income that gave me a small amount of money every month, that after a few months, I almost drag myself going to office because I didn't like what I was doing back then.

After a few years, I am still working in a corporate office as a developer. I have reached already my dreams to become a programmer and at some point in time, I realize this is not the kind of job that I want to do for the rest of my life. Time has changed, my dreams has changed. My goal now is to have my own business, to become an entrepreneur, to author books and to inspire people.

We all have the dreams. But sometimes, we gave up on it. So many of us give up that something which  supposed to be the most important part of our lifetime. Today, I am sharing to you the 5 ways that I've learned from different books, talks and seminars on how not to follow our dreams.

1. Believe in overnight success.

Success is an iceberg

Many people believe in overnight success. Many people spend their lifetime joining illegal companies that promises guaranteed returns if they invest money on their business, some even destroy their relationships for the sake of money. Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg became successful not because he developed a social network site overnight that became viral and useful for many people but he spend almost his time studying programming, developing concepts and increasing his knowledge. The same applies for the people who are in the executive level of a company,  they are not just there because of office politics that pave their way to the top or they spend 24 hours working hard instead they reached that level because they spend a lot of time studying, taking master's degree and some even doctoral degree in order to become successful in their field.

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It has been said that success is like an iceberg and most people only see what's only on the top.

2. Obeying your fears.

Sometimes, we take the counsel of our fears. "What if I failed?, I'm not an English expert, what if grammar Nazi's will laugh at me?, what if they didn't like it?". By obeying our fears, we are declaring to ourselves that we are already defeated. I often got a low score on my English class, I can't even speak in English directly before. I don't even read books and I never knew that I have a gift of writing.

I started facing my fears when I started writing my first book. After months of painstaking hard work and perseverance and a lot of prayers I was able to publish it online and sell it on Amazon. You can see it on "Books" section of my website. I am not yet close to the success I want , I am not yet there but I would never give up and so I would do more and study more to achieve that success.

3. Blaming others.

I'm a constant complainer and blamer as well before. I blame the government and other people whenever I fail. I learned that if people rejected you it's because they don't understand your mission and vision even you have the best idea in mind. Don't blame someone else. If people don't buy to you, perhaps it's time to change your plans, change your strategy, change the way you look into the situation, change the approach or even change all of them that you think didn't work out. Do not wait for a wishing star that will fall from the sky to grant your wishes because there is no such thing. You want to achieve your dreams? Start packing up your things, you are the only person responsible to make them happen.

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4. Creating and following your excuses.

One of the culprits of killing our dreams is following our excuses. "I don't know how to write, I am not confident enough, I don't know how to speak, I don't have the resources, I don't have time, I don't have the money" and so many many reasons we can think of.  Creating excuses and following them was one of my greatest obstacles. I allowed the circumstances to rule out my decisions. In order to overcome this attitude, I must submit myself to God, stop entertaining negative thoughts and start renewing my mind.

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will." - Romans 12:2

And lastly,

5. Valuing the dream and nothing else.

I have friends who loves to travel and climb mountains, I love it too! Every hike, it is a hard hike, you'll get tired and need to keep moving. After spending a few hours of hiking on the trail and finally arrived on the top of the mountain, usually there will be a celebration and after a few minutes, it's time to go down. Sounds ridiculous right? That after all, you'll just spend a few minutes at the top and that's the reality, some people fantasize that if they'll arrived at a goal, they will automatically find long term happiness there.

Life is not about achieving goals or being on the top. You know why mountaineers love climbing mountains after mountains? Because they find happiness along the journey. The same way in life. It is a journey, it is not momentary. Don't be on a hurry to achieve a goal. The best way to achieve it  is to truly enjoy every single step on the path towards it.

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You will fail sometimes, you will commit mistakes but turn that into something to learn so that you will grow as well while on the journey of life. When you reach one goal, don't forget to celebrate even if it is a small success.

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I blog about my discoveries and learnings with personal development, blogging, writing, public speaking, and publishing. I am a Jesus follower. Each month, I send out a newsletter with free tips on those topics.

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